Sometimes your love for someone can cloud everything...I have recently learned that love can easily turn into selfishness and boarderline deciet.
He is not the guilyt one... we both are, we were both dishonest (to ourselves and to eachother). But we brushed off those bad feelings and clung to one another because it felt nice-to have someone there to care for us-to warm our hearts and make us feel shiny and new...
But regardless of what we thought or felt God had other plans and it took one of us being strong enough to listen to break away from that human entrapment we were cought in.
I respect him.. i love him.. and as much as it hurts i know in my heart he is right... there is... there has to be, something better in store for our futures... some good that we must find on our own.
I struggle with feeling lost and lonely ... i have spent alot of time this week praying blindly into the heavens searcdhing for some type of answer as to why it seems like God has stripped me of all hope in love, safety, and humanity in general. I have been having a very hard time hearing answers ... my prayer has been pretty specific...
Holy Spirit, penetrate my soul
helpme to see direction in my life
Lord strip me of my physical and emotional desires
and show me the path you have set out for me
help my judgement to not be clouded by the things of this world
and the distractions of the enemy
-Amen
I have also been spending alot of time in meditation with my handy dandy iphone playing worship music.
I have been more faithful in prayer and worship than in scripture reading... Now don't get me wrong here I AM reading and i am being spiritually fed but the times of prayer and worship have been giving me a sence of peace i havent felt in a very long time... if ever.
So all i ask of you at this time, loyal readers.. is that you join me in prayer. And if you are at all struggling with the same things know that you are not alone in this fight. know that we are mearly human and we succomb to human problems.
i will be praying continually for you this week.
together with god all things are possible
until next time
LMAY
(as always please excuse any typos or misspellings)
Praying along with you. Love you so much.
ReplyDeleteMy prayers are with you, Love ya girl. Remember Deuteronomy 31:8; "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."
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